Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Dear Father Christmas

Hi, how are you? I hope you and the wife are keeping well. I am writing early this year, as some of my requests might take you a while to fulfill. I have been a good girl etc. (mostly)

1. This year I'd like a cash lump sum. About 5.2 million (sterling) should cover it.
2. A Tiffany bracelet and keyring. I know I know, these items are on my list every year and have been since 1991. I don't even know whether I even really want them. I just feel I should keep asking.
3. A miraculous weightloss solution. I find it a bit tiresome cutting out fat and sugar and nicely refined carbs. And I simply can't stop drinking. There must be something you can do about this?
4. An extra two hours a night. I must define that this is relevant to adults only. Kids do not get the extra two hours because they'll only squander them on jumping on beds and shouting for their parents.
5. The bottomless coffee cup. One is never enough in a morning, but my second is never as good. 6. A seventeen year olds breasts. To replace my current ones. (I don't mind if you retrieve my old ones from when I was seventeen, but if you can- ones with slightly smaller nips.
7. Self waxing legs, bikini line, eyebrows etc.
8. Perfect health for my children. Forever.
9. World peace.
10. A villa in Ibiza.

Thanks Father Christmas,
Love you
Minks xx

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Why Ibiza?

Minks said...

I like Ibiza

Anonymous said...

I hate Ibiza.
For Christmas this year I want to be 25.
And I want the new Take That single.